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Sunday, January 2, 2011

To another year of love, laughter, tears and joy...goodbye 2010, hello 2011.

With 2010 now two days in the past I sit here reminiscing it in its entirety. With the question being posed, "was 2010 a good year," and "what was the best part" I am still dumbfounded in how to answer these questions. 2010 brought me much adversity, tears, laughter, love, joy and hope. Without the downs I know that I would not be where I am today nor be the person those struggles turned me into being. I thank the downs and the struggles for developing me into who I am today and allowing me to find the strength in myself to prove that I can do it.
January 2010 started with a bang, in Maui to be exact...how could that go wrong! Celebrating the New Year with my husband, our two kids as well as my in-laws, Maui is a tradition that we enjoy every other year. For that, we are very thankful.
Coming home from this family vacation we returned to my in-laws home to live where we had lived for the better half of the year. Awaiting our new home build was a feat that found us finding an inner strength and new-found sense of self and family as we entered their home as a family of three and exited May 2010 as a family of four. Through our living situations and a new baby, once we found peace in our own home, we found struggles in our marriage. I know through having had Kai, that babies change you. They change what you previously lived for, but they also change your relationship as you know it with your partner. And yes, this happened with my husband and I. But the second time round, with Sienna being born, we had a different adversity to add to the normal, living in a home that wasn't ours, with a one and a half-year old and a newborn. Our distance from each other set in to a more noticeable issue once we were on our own grounds.
After all of our excitements surrounding moving into our new home and accomplishing our goal of the Oliver Half Ironman, we began facing our issues as we delved deep into who we are, who we are as a couple, and who it is we want to be: individually, together and as a family. Our findings are and continue to be ironically similar! It is funny how communication is such a simple daily thing and yet in a relationship often times is the first thing to go and where the breakdown begins. Ryan and I aren't new to the world of being together. We have been together now for eleven and a half years, married for five and a half. Yet when our story together began, we were young; throughout the years we have grown and changed, much of it together and surprisingly, much of it alone. This is where the communication has come into play. We were feeling alone. Alone yet always surrounded by one another or one of our children. Ironic isn't it. You can feel alone and sad and yet be sitting beside the one person you wish would understand you most. And so we talked...we talked ourselves through sessions of therapy, evenings at home, phone calls and texts. And now we keep talking, but there is a primary difference, we talk because we know the other person wants to listen and is receptive to hearing the other ones thoughts. Be it a negative or a positive, that's why we are together; to help one another through the good and the bad "through sickness and health" and simply put, because I love him and now I know, he loves me too.
I am hoping that this blog won't pose a "negative conversation" between us now! Lol. I write this because I am thankful for the months, the years, of ups and downs we have faced because here we are at the beginning of a new year stronger than we have ever been. I know that most people face adversity in their relationships at some point or another, and through my experience, there is hope and there are options...but you have to be open to listening. Communication is an amazing world and for us, it works.

So now, with the start of 2011, I am looking forward to a new year filled with many new adventures, goals, love, laughter and fun. I know that there will be struggles, but I am beginning to look at them differently. Now instead of the struggles dictating my life, I am going to do my best to find the lesson in them.

2010 held many positives as well, don't get me wrong! Kai turned 2, Sienna turned 1, we had our 5 year wedding anniversary, we moved, I beat me husband in Oliver ;-), Maui, Mexico, Vegas, Italy, Arizona, Seattle Marathon, Christmas in our new home...MANY moments to be thankful for.

Thank you 2010 for showing me that I am stronger than I gave myself credit for; for holding amazing memories of our children and family, and for a year that came with challenges to make sure we enjoy 2011 that much more.

"Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it."
Mother Teresa

~Happy New Year~

Thank you to the love of my life for showing me compassion, understanding, patience and most of all, love. To an amazing 2011 with much to look forward to, together.
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